For Candice van Zyl, life is a tapestry woven through with resilience, faith and family.
Laughingly describing herself as a Plain Jane, Candice is the epitome of an everyday, down-to-earth mum. Raised in the Lowveld as the youngest of three, Candice remembers long, golden afternoons spent playing in the streets with her brothers and neighbourhood friends. “We were outside all the time, playing cricket, swimming, riding bikes, only going home when the streetlights came on,” she laughs. “It was a carefree childhood, full of family, laughter, and love.”
Even then, she knew two things for sure: she wanted to help people, and she wanted to be a mum. After school, she left home to study occupational therapy at UCT, later completing her community service at Edenvale Hospital. Not long after, she married long-time family friend Justin, and together they built a life in Johannesburg. When their identical twin boys arrived, everything changed. A year later, they returned to the Lowveld, back to family, community, and the familiar warmth of home.
But behind Candice’s calm smile was a quiet battle that few could see. For years, she had been living with pain, fatigue, and strange, shifting symptoms that no doctor could explain. “I’d seen so many doctors,” she says softly. “One even told me there was nothing wrong with me, that I was just looking for attention. After a while, you start to wonder if maybe it’s true.”
It wasn’t. One morning, she nearly fell asleep at a red robot from sheer exhaustion. “That’s when I knew something was really wrong, and that I had to do something about it,” she says. A rheumatologist eventually gave her the answer: Candice was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, a chronic condition that causes widespread pain, fatigue, and a variety of other symptoms. “When I finally had a diagnosis, I felt both relieved and scared. Relieved to have a name for it, but I also felt a lot of anxiety about what the future would look like,” she says.
Over time, Candice learned that rest and self-awareness were not signs of weakness, but of wisdom. “It’s not you that is unreliable, your health is,” she says. “You need to intentionally make daily decisions that will positively affect your well-being. Worth mentioning is a notion called the Spoon Theory, a concept used by people with chronic health conditions to explain the limited energy they have each day. It’s a metaphor that helps you plan and prepare, managing your energy in relation to the tasks you need to do. You have a set number of spoons – your energy – and each activity costs one. Once you’ve used them up, that’s it. You can’t borrow from tomorrow.”
Her faith has always been her anchor, something she clung to even more tightly when she fell pregnant. Doctors had advised her to stabilise her condition before conceiving, but, as Candice puts it, “God had other plans. When I found out I was pregnant, I had to come off all my medication,” she says. “My morning sickness was so bad it lasted all day. Justin jokingly said, ‘I hope it’s twins so you only have to be pregnant once.’ We both laughed. Little did we know…” Candice smiles wryly.
At 24 weeks, a scan revealed possible complications. “That’s when everything changed,” she says quietly. “The stress triggered a severe fibromyalgia flare-up that lasted until after the twins were born.” The boys arrived early, at 33 weeks, and were whisked straight to the NICU. “Those 42 days were the longest of my life,” she remembers. “Every beep of a monitor made my heart stop.”
The hardest moment came when baby Oliver was discharged two weeks before Jack. “It broke me,” she admits. “I wanted to be with both of them, but I couldn’t. Jack had contracted Klebsiella, a hospital-acquired superbug, and was fighting for his life. Juggling this was really tough and wouldn’t have been possible without the help of family and friends, especially my mum,” says Candice. “Whilst we had one healthy little boy at home, our other baby was still in isolation. Trying to be in two places at once was extremely taxing, especially with the worry of if and when our baby would be coming home.”
When both babies were finally home, joy and exhaustion collided. “Twin parenthood is beautiful, but brutal,” she says with a laugh. “You think that by buying two of everything you’re prepared, but the truth is that there are two little humans wanting the exact same thing from you at the exact same time.”
Caring for the twins coupled with the lack of sleep and her condition soon caught up with Candice. “Fibromyalgia and newborn twins are not a good mix,” she admits. “Sleep deprivation and stress make everything worse. We eventually hired a night nurse, and honestly, it saved us.” Fortunately, Justin’s support has been a lifeline. “We used to say that it was a lot less lonely at 2 am feeds, as we were both there, figuring things out together. He has always been a very hands-on father, which helped so much.”
Now, nine years later, the boys are thriving, active, talkative, full of life. “They love rugby and cricket,” Candice says proudly. “And I love being on the sidelines, cheering them on. Watching them grow into these incredible little humans… it’s everything I ever dreamed of.”
Living with fibromyalgia continues to shape her days, but not her identity. “It’s easy to let it define you, but it doesn’t have to,” she says. “I’ve learned that courage isn’t found in the absence of pain, it’s in showing up anyway. And in keeping your faith, worshipping through the waiting. In choosing joy, even when it hurts.”
She smiles, her voice steady and sure. “Living with fibromyalgia and being a mum are a lot alike. Just when you think you’ve figured it out, something changes. You learn to be grateful for the good days and to trust that the hard ones will pass. That’s where the faith comes in.”
Cover: Candice van Zyl.
Photographer: Belinda Erasmus – Belle-Grace Photography
Make-up: Melissa Minne – Melissa Minne Hair & Make-up Artistry
Venue: Christies at 32 on Russell, Mbombela
Dress: Lynmarie Griffioen Design
