Learning the hard way that money doesn’t always equal wealth, André de Goede realised that to be the best version of yourself, sometimes you need to go back to the basics.
André runs a wireless and fibre company called Netbits Wireless Internet in Mbombela. While he loves what he does, he admits that at times it can be a little tedious. When lockdown came around, the business soared, but the effect it had on this young dad of two wasn’t as positive. “I became terribly depressed,” he says. “Financially, everything was going so well, everyone had to work from home and the business grew rapidly. But this is when I discovered I was constantly putting success into the money bracket, forgetting that it is so much more.”
André, a very physical and active person, found the incarceration difficult, and as a result his family life took a knock. “Everything was on the brink – my marriage, my emotional health, my physical health … and that is when I had my aha moment. Making my wife, children and family proud and happy were my first priority, but I realised it starts with being happy within yourself. If you are not content, you have no reserves to give contentment.
“I started to invest in my health and my family, as I knew long-term that this is where my ultimate wealth would lie. And because I had always spent so much time in the gym, I knew that being happy with my reflection would be the starting point, that ultimately I could look back at that as some sort of achievement for me. And it was. It changed my life in so many ways. I lost weight, got healthy, and became a model for Boerboel Wear, which is something I love doing!”
André first met his wife, Zerilda, at the gym. He laughingly remembers that he said to his friend, “See that girl? I’m going to marry her one day.” “I started speaking to her, but I could see she wasn’t really interested romantically. We became friends, spent a lot of time going out together, going dancing, that sort of thing, but still, she never saw me as more than a friend. When she decided to go back to Cape Town, where she was from, I asked her why don’t we get together, and she said, why? I’m going back to Cape Town, to which I replied, well, if we don’t try we’ll never know. And now we are married with two gorgeous kids, Anne-Marié (11) and Xavier (9),” he smiles broadly.
André tries to make sure that he leads by example at all times, believing that you cannot preach what you do not live yourself. “I want them to be proud of me, to say, ‘That’s my dad.’ I want them to strive to be better every day, even if it’s by 1%. I do push them to excel, but I also always ask if this is what they want. We talk openly about the basic issues of life, and I always try to take the time to listen to the drama at school.
“I also strive to be at every netball, rugby, hockey, shot-put event I can. Every time there’s a game, they ask me, ‘Gaan Pappa daar wees?’ It is important to them that I am there, which makes it important to me! I try to be there every waking hour. I irritate them sometimes,” he laughs. “You can ask them! At the moment, they are at the stage where they want to be left alone for the most part, but we must be there when they need us. It’s a weird balancing act. I try to say I love you as much as possible, so they know I’m always there.”
The family love spending time together, even though with André’s modelling schedule, they don’t get to do so as often as they used to. “I always invite them to travel along, especially if I have to go to Joburg for a shoot. They love being at home, but I love moving around and staying busy. When we do travel together, we have great fun, except for the ‘Are we there yet?’s that keep ringing in our ears!”
Cape Town is a favourite destination, and the family tries to go there every year. They also love to spend time at André’s father’s house. His brothers all have homes on the same farm, so it really is a big family get-together.
When asked what is most important in life, André doesn’t hesitate. “People … Family, friends, and even acquaintances. If you can have a positive impact on someone in any way, you get a little closer to true joy. It is intoxicating …!
Photographer: BELINDA ERASMUS
Make-up: ELSABÉ STEYN
Hair: BELINDA ERASMUS
