Fashion entrepreneur. Reality star. Motivational speaker, mom and fibromyalgia warrior. Lenore Goss-Matjie is on a mission to create a community of positivity, self-care and strength.
Talk about beauty and brains! With her captivating style and hair that screams sassy chic, Lenore Goss-Matjie is a familiar face on Durban’s social scene. As a renowned business owner, wife and mother of three, she’s become even more popular since the launch of Showmax’s The Mommy Club: Sugar and Spice, featuring Durban’s finest and most glamorous moms.
But, outside of her on-camera life and an industry that often demands more than it gives, 46-year-old Lenore is a warrior for those with fibromyalgia – a difficult and often painful autoimmune disease, one that she has battled with for almost 20 years. While balancing her various roles with grit and determination, Lenore works tirelessly to spread hope and comfort to others with the condition. Her motto in life … to embrace the journey, trust the process, and shine through every storm.
“My journey as a fibromyalgia sufferer has been both challenging and empowering. Dealing with chronic pain and extreme fatigue, daily, for almost two decades has taught me resilience and the importance of self-care.”
For those not familiar with the disease, fibromyalgia is a chronic condition that causes widespread pain and tenderness in the muscles, ligaments, and tendons throughout the body. It also often comes with other symptoms such as persistent fatigue, sleep disturbances, memory problems, brittle joints that dislocate easily, headaches, irritable bowel, light and sun sensitivity and heightened sensitivity to touch, sound and smell. The ongoing pain and exhaustion also leads to emotional challenges like frustration, depression, and anxiety.
“The exact cause of fibromyalgia is not fully understood, and for a long time no doctor in South Africa could tell me what I was suffering from. I had to travel to Germany where I was diagnosed at a pain clinic in Hamburg,” says Lenore, adding that in her case, physical trauma triggered it after a steel ladder fell on her back when she was 29 weeks pregnant with her second child.
“Despite the unpredictability of my condition, I’ve refused to let it define or limit me,” says Lenore, who has instead used it as a catalyst to prioritise her health while pursuing her passions in business, fashion, and advocacy.
“I show others that despite health obstacles it is possible to thrive professionally and personally with a determined spirit, a positive mindset and support.”
Lenore’s day begins at 5.30am with a cup of coffee and lunch prep. After the school run, housework and laundry, she focuses on her social media accounts and connects with her followers.
“I chat about fashion, from the latest trends to the importance of style choices, and my health struggles. Being authentic and staying connected with my audience, especially when I’m managing multiple ventures, even on hard days, is crucial.”
As the owner of a fashion accessory business – Styled by Lenore, Lenore’s mornings transition into design meetings and production checks for upcoming collections before she finds time to catch up with friends or business mentors and carry out the rest of her duties as the family matriarch.
“Living with fibromyalgia is a constant balancing act between managing the highs and navigating the lows,” explains Lenore. “On the good days, there are moments of relief when the pain is less intense, and energy levels are higher, allowing me to enjoy time with my children and simply feel like myself again. During these moments, I have gratitude for the small victories, like being able to run errands or take a walk without worrying that I could dislocate at any point. Getting a full night’s sleep still remains a challenge though.”
While there is currently no cure for fibromyalgia, Lenore says there are several treatment options available, with pain relievers being the most commonly prescribed to help alleviate pain, improve sleep, and ease other symptoms.
“The lows are inevitable and often unpredictable, and there are days when my condition is so debilitating that I am unable to do even the most basic things. But I have endeavoured to minimise my dependence on medication, and rely more on physical therapy, like going to gym, to help improve muscle strength and flexibility. Massage therapy and bathing in Epsom salts also offer some relief from muscle spasms and joint pain. I cannot stress enough the importance of resting, something I also constantly have to remind myself to do.”
Throughout her journey with fibromyalgia, Lenore has remained committed to raising awareness and breaking stigmas surrounding invisible illnesses, which she says is one of the hardest parts of suffering from this disease.
“Often the only visible signs of my condition are hair loss or thinning hair and skin flare-ups, and I never know when they are going to strike,” says Lenore. “On tough days, I remind myself, and others, that it’s okay to take breaks and ask for help when needed.”
As a coloured woman with mixed Indian, European and African heritage, Lenore says her unique blend of cultural richness and diverse perspective deeply influence her identity. It is this beautiful fusion of tradition and strong family ties that made her an ideal candidate for the Showmax series that showcases the daily lives and experiences of influential moms, with Indian or a diverse multi-cultural heritage, in Durban.
“I joined the show because I saw an opportunity to authentically share everyday moments that illustrate how I try to navigate business responsibilities, while managing a chronic health condition, nurturing my children and maintaining a harmonious family life,” says Lenore who says a big focus for her was on the severity of mental health.
“The long hours were sometimes physically and mentally draining and the post-show experience has its own challenges. Unwarranted criticism, in particular cyberbullying, can be difficult to manage emotionally, but for the rest it was a great experience,” shares Lenore, adding that what she enjoyed most about being on the show was being able to do it with her family.
“Filming a reality show was surprisingly similar to my everyday life, contrary to some public perception, that it is scripted. The only difference was the presence of cameras and a specific lighting setup. Everything else felt exactly the same. After a while, the cameras became almost invisible, and we were literally just getting on with our everyday lives.”
Lenore is a former educator as well as a professional Latin American and Ballroom dancer and although she no longer competes, she’s still involved in adjudicating competitions and in training to which she normally dedicates several hours a week (including the weekends) to reviewing talent and offering mentorship to up-and-coming creators.
“I love discovering new talent and nurturing the next generation of industry professionals,” says Lenore.
In all this, motherhood remains is a priority for Lenore who is blessed with three beautiful children.
“I have a 15-year-old, Jiyaana, in Grade 11, a 20-year-old, Alessandro, in his second year at Uni and also training to be a pilot, and a 22-year-old, Meah, in her final year as a medical student. We have raised our children to be respectful, dedicated, independent and most importantly loving. No matter how busy I am, my children always come first,” says Lenore, emphasising the importance of sitting around the table as a family for dinner, whether the meal is home cooked or takeaway.
“This is our family time – where we all get to speak to and listen to each about our day, and we always make sure to video call their dad, and my husband of 25 years, Neville, who is often away on business. By the time the day draws to a close, I am undoubtedly exhausted, but there’s a sense of fulfilment in my endeavours that drive me to keep going,” says Lenore.
“Being a mom comes with its fair share of challenges – there’s an expectation to be the rock balancing the demands of nurturing, guiding, and supporting your children while managing your own personal well-being and career aspirations. It’s a role I embrace as best I can. Being a mom with fibromyalgia has added an extra layer of complexity to my journey in that sometimes I don’t have the energy to do all the things I’d like to do with or for my kids,” says Lenore adding that there are days when the pain is so intense she has to rely on her family for support.
“The emotional toll of not being able to always be present in the way I want to has been challenging, but I’ve also come to realise that my experience as a mom with fibromyalgia has given me an incredible opportunity to teach my kids resilience, empathy and the importance of taking care of themselves – both physically and emotionally. It’s not always easy, but it’s part of the journey and it has shaped me into a mother who knows how to navigate difficult situations with grace, even when things aren’t perfect,” says Lenore who hopes that as her children move forward in their lives, these values will guide them in the same way they’ve guided her.
“As a mother, there are definitely some fears and concerns that come to mind when I think about the years ahead, but what I’m most excited about is watching my children take the next steps in their adult lives … first graduations and them pursuing their careers and businesses, then starting families of their own, and climbing the ladder towards reaching personal goals. But beyond the big moments, I live for the quiet, everyday moments with my children, and embracing the bond we share, as they continue to grow,” says Lenore, letting slip about her excitement for Mother’s Day that’s just around the corner.
“I love the thoughtful gestures, and Mother’s Day in our home is always a special time where I am pampered and made to feel very special, even when they are busy. This year, I’m hoping to spend a relaxing day enjoying some quality with my children – maybe start with a special breakfast or brunch, followed by whatever activity they put together. I’m looking forward to being surrounded by their love and laughter, and I always appreciate the little surprises they have in store for that make the day that much more meaningful.”
Details: You can follow Lenore on socials IG:@lenoregossmatjie and TikTok: @lenore_gossmatjie or visit lenore.co.za
