He’s an author, speaker and founder of Father A Nation. But at home, Craig Wilkinson is simply dad – unpacking masculinity, fatherhood and why showing up, not perfection, is what truly shapes a child’s life.
There’s something instantly grounding about chatting to Craig Wilkinson. Maybe it’s the way he speaks about fatherhood with such quiet conviction. Or perhaps it’s because, somewhere between community workshops, conference stages, township taverns and corporate boardrooms, he still sounds most energised by something very simple … being with his family.
And in a world obsessed with hustle culture and highlight reels, there’s something refreshing about a man whose favourite role is being a dad.
Through his non-profit company, Father A Nation, Craig works with men across South Africa to help them become positive fathers, mentors and role models in their homes and communities. The organisation focuses on fatherlessness, healthy masculinity and healing generational wounds with a simple belief at its core, when fathers heal, families and communities begin to heal too.
Awarded South Africa’s first GQ Humanitarian Man of the Year Award in 2019, Craig is also a speaker, mentor and author whose work centres on helping men become what he calls a force for good. But before the books, workshops and big conversations, there’s a quieter rhythm to his mornings.
“I always start off with prayer under the gazebo in our backyard. After that there’s almost no such thing as a normal day.”
And he means it. That non-normal day could include leadership workshops, fundraising meetings, writing sessions for two new books, or travelling the country speaking about fatherhood and masculinity.
Somewere in between, there’s always admin, his least favourite part of the job.
But ask him where he feels most like himself, and the answer is immediate.
“When I’m hanging out with my family just having fun and being together.”
Cue collective dad-aww moment.
An avid hiker and nature lover, Craig lights up when talking about the outdoors. “I feel alive in nature. It restores me, grounds me and energises me. Mountains and trails are more than a hobby, they’re a reset button.”
And perhaps that sense of grounding is exactly what shaped the father he became.
“What has fatherhood taught me?” he reflects. “That my life truly matters. That how I live and the choices I make will have an impact that outlives me.”
It’s a sentiment that runs through everything he does. In his work with fathers across the country, he’s seen firsthand how powerful presence can be in a child’s life.
“The greatest gift we can give our children is time and presence. Real presence. Full attention and engagement.”
In true Craig fashion, he distils it into two words every father needs to remember. Be there. Not perform. Not perfect. Just there.
And while Father’s Day often comes wrapped in socks, braai tongs and cheesy World’s Best Dad mugs, Craig believes modern fatherhood is far deeper than clichés.
“A great dad today is a man who is intentionally present and engaged with his children, and who is working on himself to be the best man he can be.”
It’s a philosophy shaped by his own journey too. Like many first-time dads, Craig admits he had no manual. No blueprint. Just a growing awareness that fatherhood would demand something bigger from him.
“Fatherhood became my greatest inspiration to live right, deal with my issues and childhood wounds, and model life well for my children.”
Then there are the moments that stay with him forever.
He pauses when speaking about his daughter Blythe’s heart surgery at age two. Craig was allowed into theatre to hold her as she went under anaesthetic and again there when she woke up in recovery.
“A few months later she told a friend of mine that her heart was broken but her daddy fixed it,” he recalls.
There’s no dramatic embellishment needed. The lump in your throat arrives all on its own.
Years later, another moment shifted him again when his son, Luke, turned 18 and wrote him a letter thanking him for being his brother, best friend, but most of all his father.
“He said he felt like the most fathered human on earth,” Craig says quietly. “It was the greatest gift I had ever received.”
That letter eventually inspired his first book on fatherhood and today, his latest book, Force for Good, continues those conversations around masculinity, healing and purpose.
At a time when many boys and men feel pulled between extremes – criticised on one side and influenced by unhealthy role models on the other – Craig believes there’s an urgent need for a more balanced conversation around masculinity.
“Healthy masculinity,” he explains simply, “is a man who has a positive impact on the people in his life, whose loved ones are better people because he is in their lives.”
The book explores three ideas. Being Man, Becoming a Force and Doing Good. But Craig believes many men struggle most with the first.
“None of us arrive at manhood without some wounding. Yet many men are taught to just man up and keep going.”
He believes too many men carry unresolved wounds, fears and emotional triggers they never address. Add to that conflicting messages about masculinity, and many are left unsure of what healthy manhood even looks like anymore.
For Craig, healing, self-awareness and emotional honesty are not weaknesses. They are essential parts of becoming a better man, father and partner.
He often speaks about men needing to become both warrior and lover – strong, resilient and courageous, but also compassionate, empathetic and emotionally present.
And no, vulnerability is not weakness.
“Vulnerability is the courage to be honest. It’s being authentic enough to say, ‘I’m struggling.’”
It’s also why his message resonates so widely. He doesn’t speak at people. He speaks to the lived reality of families navigating modern life.
“What’s one thing men wish they could talk about more openly? Their fears.”
Simple. Honest. Human.
Ultimately, Craig hopes Force for Good helps men embrace healthy masculinity with confidence and purpose and helps women better understand the fears, pressures and emotional wounds many men quietly carry.
“Men and women are equally valuable. We play equally important roles and are co-creators of the future. But we are also different, and those differences are something to celebrate.”
Despite the weight of the work he does and the realities of fatherlessness he encounters daily, Craig remains deeply hopeful.
“My faith in God and the incredible people I meet across South Africa keep me hopeful.”
And perhaps that’s the quiet truth running underneath it all. Not perfection. Not performance. Not having all the answers. Just presence.
Because sometimes fatherhood looks big and heroic. And sometimes it’s simply putting the phone down, kicking a ball in the garden, showing up for the school concert or listening properly when your child wants to tell you a very long story about princesses or dinosaurs for the seventeenth time.
In the end, the most important words in fatherhood are still the simplest ones of all … be there.
Craig’s simple dad truths
Your greatest fathering tool is how you live your life. The way you live speaks louder to your children than anything you say.
You are your children’s father before their friend. They need fair, consistent boundaries and the guidance to stay within them.
Model the way for your children. Be the kind of man you’d want your daughter to marry and your son to become.
Help your children discover their unique identity. Our role is not to write the script for them. Resist the temptation to impose who you think they should be.
Details: craigwilko.com; @thecraigwilko
Text: RIALIEN FURSTENBERG. Image: SUPPLIED.
